Second day of Christmas

You know how a song can sometimes get stuck in your head and you can’t get it out? Over and over and over…

Right now, a song called “Baby Come Back” by a band called Player is stuck there – Big Time – and it’s stupid and out of the blue. For my husband, it’s “Party in the USA” by Miley Cyrus* – which he’s described as reason to have her court-martialed. Why is it always a song that drives you crazy?

Anyway, that’s sorta how the things I research and/or write about are inspired; something gets lodged in my brain.

Something Tami Hasling and John Gudvangen used to say again and again is “Policy Governance®" – and so it’s their fault it got stuck in my head. I’ve previously mentioned this annoying bit of jargon, but didn’t learn more about what the heck it meant until the 69^th Annual CASB convention at the Bro^Admoor two weeks ago.

In case you didn’t know, CASB is the Colorado Association of School Boards; Jan Tanner sits on their 22-member board. There was some controversy as to why, with all of the steep budget cutting and program slashing going on, this two-day convention was held at the Bro^Admoor** – which ain’t exactly Motel 8. The excuse – er, explanation – was the discounted rates afforded by CASB’s 40-year relationship with the Bro^Admoor.

CASB was formed 21 years ago in 1988 – 48 years after their supposed 1^st Annual convention, and 21 years after the start of their alleged 40-year relationship with the Bro^Admoor (hey – I’m just working with CASB’s numbers; my teenagers helped me do the math).

When these numbers didn’t add up, I had to ask: what exactly does CASB do, especially in light of the nearly $18,000 in dues District 11 paid them last year? Inspired to visit their website, I learned that CASB provides:

• unlimited legal advice to seated school board members;
• CASB's registered, trademarked Policy Governance® training;
• Superintendent search assistance.

Sounds like an expensive load of reindeer poop to me.

I have a couple of parting comments:

1. Unless it’s due to overplay, the reason a song gets stuck in your head is often because there’s an important personal message for you in the words.
2. I worried that perhaps I came across as somewhat snarky when I made that comment about Tami Hasling coming across like a Chatty Cathy bodybuilding cheerleader doll parroting pre-recorded statements – but that worry has been lifted. There was every reason why the “Policy Governance®” song she kept chirping got stuck in my head.

In conclusion, here is a wonderful gift-giving idea for the season; if Santa brings me one, I’ll program mine to say things like “Even non-Spartans benefit from swimming” and “Keep city schools and pools open!”

Now, pardon me while I consult Player for their personal message for me.

* I love Miley.
** Jan cannot claim ignorance of the law (which is an impermissible defense anyway) in light of her own expertise in Policy Governance®; she knew good and well that her failure to properly disclose her own interest in Domino's and their lucrative pizza contract with the District was legally unethical.

Ring out, ring in

Some words on tonight's big Colorado Springs School District 11 Board of Educators meeting to say goodbye to John Gudvangen and Tami Hasling, and hello to LuAnn Long and Al Loma.

The manner in which the Directors spoke of the outgoing Gudvangen and Hasling was professional and dignified; well done, and thank you for your good manners.

Although I roasted him in an earlier post, I do have to say that former Director John Gudvangen did often ask very good questions, was always gracious, and his self-deprecating comments tonight helped me to see his kinder, gentler side - I thank you for that, as well as for your hard work and sacrifice; the very best to you in the future.

Former President Hasling cautioned the audience that her speech was "a book" - and she wasn't lying.  I've no doubt her words were sincere and heartfelt...and it was helpful for me to learn more about her.  But in my mind, her public digs at Directors Charlie Bobbitt, Bob Null and Al Loma were the height of unprofessionalism.  What a slap in the face - especially after Null had just commended her habit of always speaking well of her fellow Board members.  Singling out Directors for a public dressing down on her way out the door was in Very Poor Form, and served to reinforce my original impression of her.

The tenderness she expressed for her husband and children was her saving grace, however.  I can only imagine that her stint as President was often fraught with inner pain and turmoil, and required a great deal of time, dedication and self-sacrifice - for that, Mrs. Hasling, I thank you.

As far as the election of the Board officers - surprise, surprise.  My friend and I had accurately predicted Tom Strand as President and Jan Tanner as Vice President weeks ago.  LuAnn Long was elected Secretary, and Bob Null, Treasurer.

It's already apparent that Tom was the right choice for President.  And thank goodness Bob got the Treasurer position - a match made in heaven with trusty Assistant Treasurer Glenn Gustafson by his side.

As far as Tanner goes:  if she had properly disclosed her decade-long pizza arrangement with the District, we might all be discussing President Tanner tonight - but she didn't, and so we aren't.  She really wasn't dressed for the occasion anyway, as it appeared she had splashed an entire pizza pie on her blouse.  But by now, Tanner is already aware that...it ain't easy being cheesy.

In closing, my prayer for the Board:

Though forecasts bode ominous,

take no blind heed -- hold fast to fact.

As those around you shift and sway,

waver not, and reckon steady.

Be not mesmerized by legions of numbers,

and see through the veils of artifice.

When the mouths of duplicity whisper into each ear,

may the clear voice of truth be your sole discernment.

With discord to the left of you and deceit to the right,

reason well, and know who you are.

May the smoke of avarice never blind you

may the binding ropes of lies never tie you

The absurd and disturbed

Knowing that I read it only occasionally, a friend called to direct my attention to John Gudvangen’s op-ed in this week’s Colorado Springs Independent; it was filled, predictably, with self-congratulatory sermonizing and pompous puff-uppery. A whole lotta hot air and pride has swelled the poor man’s head – which loomed so large, I nearly missed the more interesting article on District #11’s newest elected officials.

“Departing board president Tami Hasling notes, ‘There are some really strong personalities that will be on this board.’” And two tepid ones that won’t.

“[Al Loma and LuAnn Long] are meeting with their new colleagues, getting briefed on board rules and major issues.” Hopefully Hasling isn't overseeing their orientation, considering that – by her own admission – she was and remains largely unaware of and/or unfamiliar with many long-standing District policies, procedures and board member by-laws.

“Loma has already begun softly rocking the proverbial boat,” the article clucks. “Besides staying on the STAR Academy board, he says he doesn't plan to recuse himself from D-11 votes on the STAR Academy. Legally, that's allowed, though as of press time Hasling was still investigating whether it would violate a district policy. One thing is certain: Hasling doesn’t approve. ‘It seems to me that there would be a conflict,’ she says. ‘It's disturbing, to be honest with you.’”

I’m sorry, but am I the only one who finds Hasling’s comments utterly absurd? She clammed up like the rusty-jawed Tin Man when the subject was her good friend Jan Tanner’s inflated dough; now, she’s suddenly loose-lipped and offering her sage two cents on Loma? How laughable – as in, I am laughing right now…out loud!

Why is our Board’s lame-duck President play-acting the Enforcer and concerning herself with policy now? Is it because she can be counted on to muscle in and bend the rules this way and that whenever her handlers order her to, or if it involves a close friend?

STAR Academy is a District #11 charter school; it is part of the District. CFO Glenn Gustafson sitting on the Budget Advisory and Accountability Committee…Loma sitting on the STAR Academy Board: is there a difference, or any harm? It’s a District #11 charter school, after all; it is part of the District.

Let me break this one down in no uncertain terms: regardless of the Boards on which Loma may be seated, we can all pretty much rest assured that he’s not quietly earning hundreds of thousands of dollars annually from Colorado Springs taxpayers by selling the District pizza under a 10-year, no-bid contract. This could only be more preposterous if Jan assumes Tami’s self-appointed role as the Board’s Conflict of Interest Cop.

The article then turns to take a lovey-dovey look at LuAnn Long.

“Ask current board members about their new colleagues, and you'll hear this statement over and over, ‘I don't know Al well at all, but I know LuAnn.’ They've seen her at meetings. They know her as an employee, a parent, a grandparent. They've served on district committees with her. Like her or not, Long, who most recently worked setting schedules and doing employee training for D-11, is no mystery.” 

Is it safe to assume they also already know whether she prefers anchovies and extra-cheese?

The article concludes, “[Long’s] not for charter schools unless they provide something to kids that traditional schools don't.”

Bravo.  Well, here's something the District isn't providing my kids that STAR Academy would:  a school within walking distance.

We should not be surprised to see these know-it-all elitists cuddling contentedly next to Long while peering uneasily at the lesser-known Loma: as an example of the good that can and does come from the ghetto, he is a walking contradiction of their mistaken notion that schools are wasted on poor kids because they’re inherently stupid.

Point blank, my friends:  Hasling and Tanner prove that money's neither an indicator to nor a prevention for stupidity.

So long, fare well: a good, old-fashioned roast

The outgoing Tami Hasling and John Gudvangen participated in their final Colorado Springs School District #11 meeting of the Board of Educators tonight, and to celebrate, I thought I’d give them a good old fashioned roast.

____________

I said before that Tami makes being blonde look like a lot of fun; but she also gives a lot of credence to all those blonde jokes. Perhaps in the circles of shallow water in which she happens to swim, hers is considered a serious intellect; but I’ve never heard her utter anything even a little bit deep in the entire time I’ve been following the Board.

If her Facebook page is any indicator, this is a happy time for us both: Tami has barely been able to wait for her stint on the Board to come to an end - and I’ve always resented her tendency to try and silence the only real thinker on the Board, Charlie Bobbitt.

Watching her pass notes to Jan Tanner on t.v., I can only imagine that in school she was always one of those popular jock/teacher’s pets – airy and unconcerned, and viciously cruel to the outsider.

They say the brain is a muscle – though I must admit, I don’t know myself if it’s true – but if it is, hers has shin splints. She reminds me so much of George W. Bush, or a Chatty Cathy Bodybuildin’ Cheerleader doll…wearing her “Trust Me, I’m Smart” glasses and chattering a handful of pre-recorded statements: “Kids are great! School is fun! Policy governance!” I just have to wonder, who was pulling her string this whole time.

___________

Considerably more astute, but just as deep is John Gudvangen. I tried to look up the meaning of his surname, but had trouble finding one; I speak Dutch fluently, though, and will attempt a translation: Good Catching. Perhaps he did play ball, but I doubt it; he doesn’t really strike me as a jock – popular, or otherwise - but rather as a brainiac nerd.

A little too smart for his own good, and a little too good for his own smarts. Indeed, he can be counted on to make proud mention of his long-past claim to fame as valedictorian of his graduating class at Harrison – and for that, I applaud him. But really, John, how hard is it to float to the top of a school with such a high percentage of low-income and minority students?

Judging from his own writings and statements, he is an absolute educational elitist. “Oh, poverty, hrrrm hrrm and rumble…poor people are so simple that they’ll accept the substandard as good enough; by all means, warehouse all of the poor kids in a decaying century-old building – they’ll end up thanking us for it.”

Prone to self-important pontificating well after the audience has lost interest – as was evidenced in his l-e-n-g-t-h-y speech at Palmer to North Middle School’s eighth graders: be honest, John, couldn’t you hear the audience snoring?

Auf wiedersehn, Herr Gudvangen – hopefully, your future will be bright, and full of opportunities to pause weightily before laying all of your deep thoughts on us. But take this spider’s advice - leave the accordion at home.

Thanks so much to you both for voting to close schools – I’ll always remember you for it. Awww, just kidding, you two - I’m sure that so many of your “decisions” were dictated by the Puppetmaster.

But, truly:  thank you for your service.  It couldn’t have been easy, but think of it this way: at least you were part of the “In” crowd for a while – something some of us will never really know…and you’ll no longer need worry about poor, simple black spiders spinning your yarns.

It's good to be king

Hello dear readers. So much has happened in the past week that I thought I’d take a lesson from Board of Educators Director John Gudvangen and pause – slowly, deliberately, and meaningfully – to ready you for all the profundities about to spill forth.

Wednesday’s Special Meeting/Work Session began with the D#11 Board of Educators going executive session to discuss conflict of interest issues with their lawyers, Holmes, Roberts and Owens, along with an independent counsel. The Gazette’s Sue McMillin stood up and correctly protested in point of order, but she was shut down by President Tami Hasling’s explanation that there was no provision for "citizen comments" during “special meetings.” Emerging after an hour of what I can only imagine was animated chatter amongst themselves, the team moved on with a lengthy PowerPoint presentation on the “23 Points" – action items that were identified in the wake of their decision to close eight public schools.  Glenn Gustafson had the finale with his how-closing-eight-schools-saved-us-$3-million-dollars pep talk.

The following day, the superintendent issued a press release stating that, with regard to Director Jan Tanner, no violations had been found – legal, ethical, or otherwise.

Hmph. So, that’s their story, ‘n they’re stickin’ to it. Good for them.

No, I mean, it really is good for them; indeed, as Mel Brooks pointed out again and again in “History of the World, Part I”…

“It’s good to be the king.”

Regarding the executive session: The ruling class circled their wagons protectively around the broken-winged Mrs. Tanner - though I suspect less out of loyalty and more out of self-preservation. But if at any time Tanner’s ethics cooties had threatened to spread amongst her associates, no doubt they’d all play dumb and start calling her “Jan who?” Heck, Peter did it to Jesus – three times!

When it comes down to a me-or-you type of situation, yesterday’s ally can shift into today’s adversary with the blink of an eye; and considering all of the shrugging and lash-batting that goes on, I suppose we should all simply accept such shiftiness as par for the course.

I’m curious to know who the independent counsel was, though – probably an attorney from the law firm of Gustafson, Gustafson and Guy.

Turning to the “23 Points”: In many ways, it reminded me of an old-school pep rally. I nodded off at one point, and at others found myself laughing at the bemusing spectacle of whoopee and camaraderie and premature back-patting.

Each one of those 23 points received about three minutes of time, and was absolutely reminiscent of the Capital Improvements updates we citizens would occasionally receive. “Improvements to Adams – done. Improvements to Bristol – done. Improvements to Buena Vista – 75% done. “ And so on.

But if there’s one thing I have noticed beyond anything and everything else is that Gustafson will change the numbers to fit his needs. “Oh, did I say six? I meant to say seven.” And folks – there’s a whole lotta numbers. He knows no one is really able to keep track – and that’s the bottom line. As former superintendent Terry Bishop once told a very good friend of mine…”We can make the numbers say whatever we want.” I will revisit the $3 million Gustafson has “saved” through school closures in an upcoming post.

In summary: Hope diminished with Gledich’s press release (although, who can blame him – this rot predates him, and he’s just doing his job); hope rekindled with Sue McMillin’s stand (who’s also limited in many ways by her bosses, I imagine); expectations met by Tanner and clan…and resentment kept at a steady simmer by Gustafson and his magic money minstrel show.

Regardless of press releases and “who, me?” protestations, all that’s been demonstrated is the District’s willingness to meet behind closed doors, go on the defensive, make up special rules for themselves, create distractions, and shine on the public.

Business as usual for the monarchy, it seems.

When reporters for the newsweekly Colorado Springs Independent were traipsing through City Councilman Tom Gallagher’s messy yard and taking pictures of dirty diapers in his trash, his fellow Councilman Jerry Heimlicher said elected officials should expect their mistakes to be exposed by the press:

“I think we have to hold ourselves to a higher standard…

we have to be conscious (that) anything and everything we do is subject to public scrutiny.”

When you run for public office, you become a celebrity in a way; you are in the public’s eye. And spiders sometimes have eight eyes – a pair for each pair of legs, I presume - how spooky is that?? Indeed, Proverbs 30:25 states that while a spider is little upon the earth, she is exceedingly wise. And while it probably is good to be the king,

“the spider taketh hold with her hands, and is in king’s palaces.”

This is a fact: when they closed the school across the street from my house, District #11 became my own personal hobby; and until the school across the street from my house re-opens as a school, District #11 will remain my hobby. And I love to share my hobbies with others.

I stand 100% behind my allegations. I’m not muckraking; everything is based upon public record.  As time permits, I’ll go back to my previous postings and upload the actual documents upon which they are based...so you can see for yourselves.

I strive to be a blend of Will Rogers, C.S. Lewis, Langston Hughes and Erma Bombeck.  And though I’ll sometimes share my musings on personal matters, and write about other issues that affect the citizens of Colorado Springs, I will continue to shine my brightest spotlight on District #11 – the people who taught me how to hold my pencil.

I hope the Board has been adequately cautioned that a very spirited and loquacious spider is watching them – closely.

The law of kindness

She openeth her mouth with wisdom, and in her tongue is the law of kindness.

Last night after the Board meeting, I found a quiet moment to sit back and reflect and listen for the voice of God - a foreign concept for so many...but comforting and familiar for me.

“If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all.”

So, I find myself guided this time to say something nice, and nothing not-so-nice, in order to provide balance to some of the biting criticisms I’ve offered up thus far. I know more about some than others…so if it sounds superficial, it’s not meant to be.

(in alphabetical order by last name)

Charlie Bobbitt – when the schools were being closed, he took it upon himself to actually walk the proposed routes, putting himself in the shoes of the kids – and I thought that was totally awesome; unafraid to be a party of one.

Nick Gledich - such a steady and impressive leader; so approachable by and gracious to the everyday man - the Board worked well together in selecting him, and the District is fortunate to have him.

John Gudvangen – mellifluous: his manner of speaking is so smooth and soothing, I’m sure I could have a cavity filled without need of anesthetic if he were talking to me while it was happening.

Glenn Gustafson – wizard of numbers, architect of words, confident public speaker, seemingly flame-resistant and bullet-proof – I’ve often wondered what his D#11 teachers and classmates thought of him.

Tami Hasling – I love to swim: she swims, and coaches swimming. I bet she’s a great coach, and she makes being blonde look like a lot of fun.

Sandra Mann – I grew up watching her report the news, and she lives on the same street where I was raised. Strikes me as open-minded, curious, candid and genuine.

Bob Null – Old-school, old fashioned, disciplined, conservative, courageous, congenial, straightforward and sincere; in some ways, he reminds me of the late, great Bob Isaac.

Mike Poore – such an energetic, convincing and well-dressed speaker; makes a good first and lasting impression.

Tom Strand - growing up, I always wanted to be an attorney (though I’m glad I’m not one now)…so he gets what-I-wanted-to-be-when-I-grew-up points; understands the complicated written word, and has a perfect voice for radio.

Jan Tanner – when I think about the homespun manner in which she speaks, she reminds me of Sarah Palin. Youthful…and I admire that she’s raced to the top of Pikes Peak many times.

Mary Thurman – driven, determined, prepared and brainy - she knows her stuff.

School District #11 - To wax numerological, it is half of my lucky number 22; my direct family members have attended 5 of its elementary schools, 2 of its middle schools, and one of its high schools – 8, like the legs of a spider. The place where Mrs. Sutton granted me my poetic license; the place where I first made friends and enemies and fell in love. To me, it is synonymous with “Colorado Springs,” and I am easily brought to tears simply by looking at old photos of its schools. I am more than an acquaintance, more than just a friend – it is a part of me, and I of it. I am its grateful offspring, and will always love and revere it with a child’s wonder.

Two thumbs up

Those of us who can remember way back to the 1970’s will recall a PBS program called Sneak Previews, hosted by Gene Siskel and Roger Ebert, film reviewers for the rival Chicago Sun-Times and Chicago Tribune. When their opinions diverged, their disagreements were sure to entertain; and when they were in agreement, their assessment was generally a pretty safe bet. Sharp wit and terse critiques aside, many people paid attention because of the simple manner in which they summed up a film: by show of thumbs – either up, or down.

Now, I’ll admit, I enjoy watching a small-screen spectacle as much as the next guy; but unless you subscribe to cable, you miss a lot of the good stuff. I don’t; but a good friend of mine does, and so we’ve established Wednesdays as our weekly “date night,” when we drink coffee and nosh and cackle while watching the D#11 Board meeting on Channel 16.

(aside: The Board should really begin a streaming broadcast of the meeting: 1st, because not everyone gets cable, 2nd, because not everyone has schedule flexibility that permits them to attend five-hour long night-time meetings across town, and 3rd, because with all of their bought-and-paid-for fiber optic infrastructure, it’s well within their ability to do so. Progressive is as progressive does; not all of us enjoy a six-figure income, so stop disenfranchising those of lesser means.)

I was hoping for some real fireworks at Wednesday night’s Board meeting – my anticipation aroused all the more by the executive session that lasted until 7:00 p.m. – but instead, it was the standard drone about this item and that. Some time after 10:00 p.m., Mike Poore introduced a speaker who spent the next 45 minutes talking about math: and trouper though I am, this had upon me an effect identical to chloroform. Mumbling that “they’ll probably save the best for last,” I begged off and lumbered home around 11:30 p.m.

And though I accurately predicted the show’s ending, I was not disappointed when my friend messaged me with a synopsis of what happened next:

When it came time for each of the Directors to address the Board, Bob Null expressed a desire to look closer at possible Board member conflicts of interest. A quiet pause; then came President Hasling’s request for a show of thumbs in favor.

Two thumbs up, from Directors Null and Bobbitt.

Perhaps the others were sitting on theirs?