Quitter

Happy New Year all, hoping you all had a good one.



You know, many, many, many years ago -- I'd say 22 at least -- I was minoring in classical voice at CSU by day and by night, singing the blues and smoking inside this and that bar; some days and nights were better than others...

...but the New Year Eve I'm thinking of did not have me operating at *prime*.

Ennyhoo, I have always been a huge Led Zeppelin fan, and I was up on-stage at a bar called The Sports Page...drunkenly butchering a Zep song that under any other circumstances I'd have known every little nuance....and a kindly bar person clapped and stepped up to the mike and thanked me, "That was Spydra, ladies and gentlemen, give her a hand..."

...and as I basked in the smattering of drunken applause and proceeded to exit the stage, my heel caught the mike cord, and I kid you not, all:  I fell off the stage in front of everyone that night ~face first~...like, right onto my face, like you see in cartoons and stuff.

I guess I got to my feet and managed to stand; what little bits and pieces of the night I remembered only came to mind whenever I rubbed the big bruise on my forehead the following day.  

I also lost my purse and my keys that night, something I guess that didn't come to light until I was trying to enter my apartment; my date that night was so anxious to part ways with me that he broke a window pane in order to help get me inside.

When I awoke that morning after having passed out on the sofa, there was a light dusting of snow on my face, and I was SO hung over, I will never, ever forget how I felt that morning; seasick and dying.

They found my purse at the bar, with half of my money and cigarettes still inside of it...but I had to call a cab to go to the bar and get it and *bring* it to me, for I was so, so sick...and too sick to stand...and the very thought of those cigarettes caused me to turn several shades of green.

Ah, the good old days.

I think of that story from time to time, but especially any time I see a bottle of champagne -- which I did this weekend; I think it's so amazing that I managed to stop drinking and getting drunk like an idiot, and every once in a while I can actually enjoy a few drinks without going completely insane.

Just one example of what a difference 22 years can make; here's another:

I am so pleased and ASTONISHED to announce that I QUIT SMOKING A WEEK AGO...this despite the fact that my husband has been sitting next to me, smoking.

HOW IS THIS POSSIBLE???  I have been smoking for 27 years, ever since my husband smoked my first cigarette with me when we were 15 years old!!!  WHAT IN THE WORLD!!??

I am like, so totally, completely amazed.  This is no mere new year's resolution, friends; I KNOW THAT I QUIT SMOKING. 

I feel like flippin' SUPERWOMAN, y'all....WONDERWOMAN....SPIDERWOMAN.

Anyway, if you haven't already seen this movie called "Slumdog Millionaire", I highly recommend it; it's not what motivated me to quit smoking, but I watched it at the same time this unexplained, unexpected, utterly unbelievable metamorphosis was taking place with me, so I kind of associate it with magic and destiny, the greatness of God, and INCREDIBLE PERSONAL TRANSFORMATION; indeed, it instantly became my favorite movie....at any rate, if you get a chance and want to see a very inspiring, exciting, sweet, excellent movie, CHECK IT OUT (no nudity; I recommend it to and for ANYONE, except for maybe kids eight and under; there are a couple of intense scenes of violence).



No doubt 2011 will have good mixed with bad, but I know that at least for me, there's already been a vastly different start to the new year...and I can only believe it's certain to be a memorable year for us all.

Thanks for your support, and God bless; I'll do my best to make you proud...and if nothing else, better informed and aware...

love you -- xoxo