Wednesday, March 21, 2012

Noreen & the Rocky Mountain Oyster Party

Awarded to Barry "Bozo" Noreen
The forecast today is for fair weather…so when I opened my front door this morning to pick up the blue-sheathed flyer laying upon my “Welcome” mat, I had no reason to anticipate the noxious brown cloud that momentarily obscured the sun upon turning to page 3 of the Gazette. 

Typically, the sight of Barry Noreen’s byline is enough to evoke from me a frown (as it’s distressing to know that a hack like he receives pecuniary recompense for thedrivel he strains to produce every other day), and a yawn (for indeed, that two-bit hack is nothing if not uncommonly insipid).  I was startled, however, when Noreen's ordurous offering for today literally caused me to break wind. 

Noreen first confesses to his inability to read, confusing the words “tie” and “tea”.  Newsflash:  only idiots struggle with three-letter words.

Noreen's mentor in all things Tacky & Tasteless
 “As it turns out, there’s a Rocky Mountain Black Tea Party…” spouts clueless Noreen with surprise.  I’ll forgive him his ignorance in this instance, considering the sheltered life that lily-liver leads.

Backasswards Barry then dons his flouncy gown of rainbow-bright racism…posing stiffly and vogue-ing boldly, as though he were one of tacky Queen Nobama’s mule-faced bridesmaids.

“Why a tea party for blacks?”  You see, Barry believes only white people drink tea and party.  “Wouldn’t the existing tea party allow people of color?” Yes, Barry, the existing tea party DOES allow colored folks; banned, however, are the colorLESS – meaning no tea for you.

Now comes Chief Justice Noreen, dutifully raising the question of parity: “Will there be separate-but-equal tea parties? Tea parties for Jews, Native Americans and Pacific Islanders?”  As though Pacific Islanders aren’t “people of color”.  Get with it, yer honnah - say “black” if and when you mean “black”.  It is a great idea, though, Barry; you should suggest such segregated soirees at your next Kommie Klub for Krackers confab.

Noreen ends his unintelligent column thusly:  “Overall the tea party has gained power, but so far it has merely divided the GOP, threatening its chances to unseat Obama.  Not surprisingly, the newest tea party spinoff is designed to recreate the big tent – as in a circus.”

I’m sorry, but did Barry Noreen just call black conservatives clowns???  Yo mama, biatch!

You asked some stupid questions, Barry, but my answers are decidedly smarter.  Allow me to break it down for you, right here, in black and white.

It is a fact that the majority of Americans are white.  Whites can vacillate between voting Democrat, Republican or Independent without noticeably drawing attention; as such, the white vote is harder to pigeon-hole by leftist, racist pea-brains like Bozo Noreen.  Indeed, the white vote is the biggest unknown, so most politicians pander to the white vote first and foremost.

It is also a fact that persons belonging to the "protected classes" - i.e., women, blacks, latinos, Jews, Samoans, homosexuals - typically vote Democrat.  I can only imagine the hare-brained questions Noreen would ask the leaders of the Gay Tea Parties springing up across this great nation.  Guess what, Barry, there are even gay people of color - are you equally concerned about the tea they’ll be drinking, the company they’ll be keeping, and whether or not their party will be serving canapes?

The "protected classes" are by definition in the minority; as such, political pandering to these groups comes as somewhat of an afterthought. That's why leftists like Barry do all they can to slice and dice us all into manageable groups - a tactic known as "divide and conquer".  However, when you have whole groups of people voting *against* how they’ve been typecast by jerks like Barry Noreen, well, those folk might just wish to mix and mingle; they might wish to rub elbows with each other whilst celebrating their diversity.  In case he's still experiencing difficulty in grasping this concept, I suggest that Barry take a moment and contemplate the many hows, whys and ways that the GLBT "community" segregates itself from the rest of society.

The fact that the black vote has suddenly become less certain - thereby attracting the uncommon attentions of politicos on the woo - is indeed cause for celebration,  No doubt, it’s daunting for Noreen and his ilk to recognize the goodly number of Democrats dissatisfied with the miasma created by our illegitimate commander-in-chief Barack Hussein Obama...daunting to see them aligning with the Tea Party; just as it’s daunting to the Republican status quo that conservatives are NOT lining up behind Mitbot Romney, and paying little heed to the artificially inflated poll numbers that would have us all believe the contrary.

When it comes right down to it, voting is not an issue of race; it is a matter of personal opinion...and you know what they say about opinions, don't you?  Like assholes, everybody's got one; the Gazette's asshole is Barry Noreen.

Really, white, black or otherwise, could not we all, now and then, benefit from the occasional, attentive ministrations of a silver-tongued panderer, regardless of hue?

But silver-tongued is something Barry decidedly is not, his hackneyed, hoe-hum tongue tarnished near-black as it is.  Noreen uses what little lingual skill he has in a most niggardly manner, that is to say, measly, paltry, puny, piddling, pathetic.  I am ceaselessly amazed and annoyed that the Gazette continues to shine its dim limelight on the ever-tepid musings of the whining hack known as Barry Noreen...who doggedly earns his rightful place as the Third Worst Writer Ever (FirstPlace:  the punctuation-challenged Mike Moran of the USOC; Second Place: Elizabeth Alexander, King Nobama’s official poetess and author of the lamest poem ever, “Praise Song for the Day”).

Speaking as a black conservative woman native to ColoradoSprings, I must say I find Noreen’s column today anathema; racist, obtuse and insulting.  I enjoy hitting back, though, and unlike Barry, I *don't* punch like a girl.   Have fun looking up the definitions to the words you don’t know, Barry.

The Tea Party is open to everyone who loves America, regardless of extraneous details like race, creed, gender and sexual orientation; only commie clownsneed not apply.  Barry, the Rocky Mountain Oyster Party is down the hall to your left; bring your own tea bags.


1 comment:

  1. connieglenn@fctc.coopMarch 22, 2012 at 11:19 AM

    Couldn't hae said it better, myself ;) I am sure that Rocky Mountain Black Tea Party would appeciate this Noreen did them a GREAT DISSERVICE!!!!!